I did not want to do shit today.

I woke up tired, I woke up lazy, I woke up ready to go back to bed. But, today I proved to myself even if I hate everything I’m doing, I can still get it done. 

I went to curves this morning, went around the circuit twice. If you don’t know what the circuit is, I’m going to make a blog post about it after this, so I can link to it in the future. So, fear not, those who have never quite figured out what curves is, I will help you. Anyway, I really enjoy the work out. It’s low impact, focused on cardio, and still gets to every muscle. Tonight, I did an interval walk: walking normally for 5 minutes as a warm up, as the workout I repeated switching from a moderate pace for 3 minutes to a brisk pace for 1 minute for 25 minutes, then I did a normal paced cool down for 5 minutes (well, I had to pee really badly so I actually did a 3 minute cool down but shhhh). 

I’m so proud of myself for working out twice today while feeling like I didn’t want to do a thing. I was so tired all day, I was sore tonight doing my walk after working out this morning, I was mentally exhausted due to work and cleaning my house and the never ending pile of dishes in my sink. My son started his new daycare today so I was worried about that. But nevertheless, she persisted. I think that’s my new mantra, it encompasses everything I’m going through right now. Eventually, I will write a blog post about the passing of my youngest son, Jonah, in October. He was 11 days old. I think I’m using that pain to push forward, which is good for me.

It’s weird, I’ve never been so able to diet, work out, stick to something like this. It hasn’t been easy, I’ve had moments where I just wanted to quit and order a burger, but I’m almost 5 weeks into this and I am starting to see that I can do this.


  • 4 oz chicken (100 calories)
  • Half cup of sweet peas (80 calories)
  • 10 stalks of asparagus (30 calories)
  • 3 oz of mushrooms (20 calories)
  • 2 tbsp ketchup (40 calories)

I sauteed the mushrooms, pan seared the asparagus, pan cooked the chicken, and the peas were out of a can.  I allowed myself some ketchup for a treat, and my calories were low. It was a good dinner!
All in all, today I learned that on my worst days I can do my best.


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